| Wednesday, April 25, 2007 |
| Religious Ramblings |
Having a baby is amazing. Duh. I love how the Hippo wakes up in the morning - all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed - he smiles and laughs and kisses. Yum!
My husband and I are Orthodox Jews. At times, I wane in my dedication to religious law, though (almost) never in my faith in God. I sort of expected that when the Hippo arrived, I would experience this religious rebirth - a reaffirmation of my faith and my desire to perfect my observance so as to pass it on to my offspring.
Yeah. Right.
That SO didn't happen.
What did happen? I had a hard time seeing my child as Jewish. We had the whole circumcision (boy, was that about the hardest thing I've ever done) and our rabbi was one of the first people to see him. My husband joyously blessed him on his first Shabbat and then welcomed the guests who came to the Shalom Zachar (a "welcome baby" reception on the baby's first Friday night). Yet, when I looked at the Hippo, all I saw was my little boy.
I dreamed of taking him to the lake and the woods, of reading my favorite childhood books to him, of teaching him to swim. Was religious education in there anywhere? Nope. Nada. I even felt at first like I shouldn't push my religion on him (I don't push it on any other human beings, after all). Logically, I know this would be a HUGE mistake. I've always thought that it is better to bring a child up in religion and then let him reject it later on if he needs to - not that I would want him to, but he's got free will like everyone else.
So, what of it? I'm still there - not really realizing that soon I'll have to start teaching him to say brachot (blessings). I already say the "Shema" (night time prayers, basically) with him at night (when I remember) and would sing "Hamalach hagoel" (more night time prayers) with him if I could ever remember to ask my friend how it fits with the Brahm's lullaby tune. I have even washed negel wasser (ceremonial washing of the hands upon awaking in the morning) with him a few times - though I have a hard enough time remembering to do it myself. My heart wasn't in these activities at first, but I'm starting to feel their importance. I don't know whoever said, "Fake it till you make it", but in this case, it appears to be true.
What's going well for me religiously? I talk to God way more than I used to. Not whole conversations. I mean, I don't really hear anything in response (though the answers come in other ways, to be sure). I ask and thank. I ask God every day to protect my little boy and to keep him safe with me and Papa M. I ask God for wisdom about whether or not to vaccinate him at this tender age (another whole can of worms). I thank God for sending us such a wonderful little boy. I thank God for returning us home safely from a trip.
Basically, I talk to God a WHOLE lot more than I used to. Do I stand in the corner with my prayerbook saying the proscribed prayers? No way, Jose. But I feel connected. I feel God's BIG-ness (as much as a human can). I guess that's enough for now.Labels: education, judaism |
posted by Mama K @ 12:33 PM  |
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| Thursday, April 19, 2007 |
| To cry or not to cry? |
Papa M and I really try to respect the Hippo as a human being. Really. I tell him "cold" before wiping his nether regions with a baby wipe. If he's sleeping and I need to move him (off my lap because my foot's falling asleep, for example), I whisper to him what's going to happen. When he cries or vocalizes, I try to get a gut feeling about what he's telling me. We cosleep and don't plan on "sleep training" - the hot topic at our M&M (Mom and Me) group right now. If he cries we try to respond right away.
Yet, today we were out most of the morning - first for a long walk and then running errands. On the way to the last errand, the Hippo let me know that he was hungry by loudly crying from his carseat. This errand took us to a lovely lake and park so I figured I'd feed him when I got there. I told him the plan and he cried. I could've pulled over and fed him by the side of the road, but I was having visions of the sun on our faces as we breasfed next to the water gently lapping the shore so I drove on. As we drew closer, I felt more and more guilty. I mean, we don't let him cry this much any other time, so why was I bent on getting where I want to be? I don't have an answer. Am I placing my convenience before his comfort or am I making a legitimate choice to do something I will enjoy?
I think I should've stopped to nurse him. Parenting is a steep learning curve. Hopefully this poor kid (and his mom) will survive. |
| posted by Mama K @ 5:48 PM |
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| Wednesday, April 18, 2007 |
| Way to Go, SCOTUS! |
Today the Supreme Court upheld the ban on so-called partial birth abortions. Kudos. I'm totally serious.
Just in case anyone missed the point, let's review the facts. A partial birth abortion is rare and takes place in the "mid to late second trimester". Mid-pregnancy (and thus mid-second trimester) is 20 weeks. The second trimester traditionally ends around 28 weeks. In this day and age, a baby is potentially viable outside the womb beginning at 21 weeks. A 28 week gestational age baby is almost certainly viable given the right care. A partial birth abortion therefore amounts to full-blown murder.
The primary reason the law was contested is that it contains no provision for the "health of the mother". Now, wouldn't one assume that if, God forbid, a baby needed to leave the womb in the mid-to-late second trimester, a place could be prepped in the NICU of the best hospital available and everything could be done to save the lives of both mother and baby? Any mother who would desire otherwise is guilty of infanticide. I've been wracking my brain all day to come up with a scenario in which partial birth abortion would even be plausible and I just can't find one. |
| posted by Mama K @ 8:37 PM |
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| Where the hell have we been? |
| On April 1, Papa M, the Hippo and I left our beautiful west coast home for the midwest to visit family and friends. It was a nice visit. Friends and family were warm and welcoming and a good time was had by all. The weather sucked. Our rental car, a Chrysler 300, was a complete piece of shit. No wonder Daimler-Benz is dumping them. In a nutshell, it drove like a boat and steered at will. Keeping it in a straight line on the straight midwestern freeways was a challenge. |
| posted by Mama K @ 10:41 AM |
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